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Uang mahar atau masyarakat Sulawesi biasa menyebut 'uang panai', sudah menjadi adat yang harus dituruti oleh seorang laki-laki apabila akan menikahi calon istrinya.
Besaran dan juga jumlah pemberian uang panai ini mnelalui kesepakatan dari keluarga perempuan maupun laki-laki.
Tetapi terkadang, uang panai ini justru menjadi beban bagi laki-laki yang kurang berkecukupan.
Ini karena di Sulawesi, besaran uang panai bisa dibilang di luar batas wajar bagi masyarakat luas.
Bahkan, beberapa di antara calon mempelai perempuan meminta panai mencapai miliaran rupiah.
Melansir dari Kompas.com, besaran uang panai ini disesuaikan dengan strata atau status seorang perempuan tersebut.
Apakah ia berasal dari keluarga terpandang, bagaimana pendidikannya, apa pekerjaannya dan lain sebagainya.
Bahkan keputusan tersebut sudah disahkan dan seolah menjadi adat-istiadat bagi masyarakat Sulawesi.
Beberapa memandang uang panai di Sulawesi terlihat sangat tinggi dan fantastis.
Bukan tanpa alasan, seorang Budayawan Sulawesi Selatan, Nurhayati Rahman mengungkapkan bahwa bagi suku Bugis, khususnya, uang panai akan membuat seorang laki-laki tidak dengan mudah menceraikan istrinya.
"Makanya susah untuk mendapatkan orang suku Bugis Makassar, tapi susah pula lepasnya atau bercerai. Dalam artian, tingginya harga panai akan membuat pihak lelaki akan berpikir seribu kali untuk menceraikan istrinya karena ia sudah berkorban banyak untuk mempersunting istrinya. Pada uang panai itulah dilihat kesungguhan sang pria untuk mendapatkan perempuan pujaan hatinya," ujar Nurhayati.
Meski begitu, uang panai juga harus menyesuaikan dengan kemampuan dan juga kesepakatan.
Bila tak ada kesepakatan kedua belah pihak, pernikahan bisa saja batal terjadi.
Seperti yang baru-baru ini terjadi, seorang perempuan asal Kolaka, Sulawesi Tenggara, harus rela melepas kekasih hatinya demi perempuan lain.
Bukan tanpa alasan, laki-laki yang menikah dengan perempuan lain ini dulunya sempat melamar sang perempuan, namun uang panai yang dipasang pihak keluarga perempuan dinilai terlalu tinggi.
Pihak laki-laki merasa keberatan dan akhirnya lamaran mereka batal.
Dalam sebuah video yang diunggah di akun Youtube Nina Nurmalasari, memperlihatkan seorang perempuan dengan gaun bir menyala memeluk mempelai laki-laki.
Kemudian ia juga memeluk mempelai perempuan yang bergaun merah muda.
Setelah itu, ia memeluk kedua mempelai dan ia kemudian meminta juru foto di tempat itu untuk mengabadikan momennya.
Perempuan bergaun biru itu berdiri dan menggandeng laki-laki yang merupakan kekasih yang batal menikahinya karena besarnya uang panai.
Hingga saat artikel ini ditulis, hanya diketahui bahwa peristiwa terjadi di Kolaka, Sulawesi Tenggara.
Namun tidak diketahui siapa perempuan di dalam video tersebut dan juga laki-laki di video tersebut.
Video tersebut kemudian juga viral dan diunggah ke akun Instagram @makassar_iinfo, dan menuai banyak komentar dari warganet.
Banyak yang menjelaskan bahwa uang panai bukanlah sebagai ajang gengsi semata. Ini sudah menjadi adat yang harus dipatuhi.
@rizkysyakina: @yeni.rahmawati96 aku bantuin jelasin yah mba...kebetulan sy perempuan bugis asli, uang panaik sebenarnya hanya untuk melihat keseriusan laki2 apakah dia betul2 ingin berjuang dan sbenarx jg spy laki2 bsa lebih mnghargai sebuah pernikahan dan bsa bekerja keras tdk malas2an, ibaratnya kyk gini..jgn smpe laki2 berpikir menikah itu mudah dan murah dsb jd akhirnya mmbuat makna pernikahan seakan di gampangkan jdx bisa minta cerai seenakx,, nah klo dr awal si laki2 susah payah ngumpulin uang buat nikahin cwe bugis idaman si pria pst mikir "sy udh susah payah memperjuangkan dgn tenaga,waktu,keringat dan materi masa iya sy hrus nyeraah " makax di kluarga sy khususx hampir gak ada yg nikah cerai krn mengargai pendampingnya. Dan sbenarx itu uang panaik tdk ada standartx krn itu bsa dibcarakn baik2 semampunya si pria. Tdk smuax kluarga bugis memaksakan standrtnya. nah kalau mslah kemampuan si pria cm bisa 50jt misalnya akan di kmbalikan lg ke pihak kluarga wanita tp smua kputusan ada di wanitax. Klo di kluarga sy slama saling suka, uang panaik dan mahar msh bsa di bcarakan baik2 dan tdk ada yg di paksakan. Yang paling penting kebahagiaan dan berkah dr menikah itu sndiri. (*)
